Saturday 28 April 2012

Moving Images Challenge #54

(WARNING!  "Colorful" language alert!)



THE BRUSH OFF

"I have been very busy with my job this week, but I am also trying to work through reconciliation with my ex. She has been staying here this week and we are hoping to get back together and perhaps re-marry. I have not really had any alone time until this morning.  Please know that I care about you and never want to hurt you, but I must say goodbye in order to give this situation a chance to work," he'd said.




"Fuck you, too, asshole!" she thought, spinning to keep the raging anger flowing, and the crushing tears at bay.

Fiction in a Flash #86

This photograph was taken from the Internet.

The "rules" are few and very simple:
* Your entry will come due each Saturday, when a new picture will be posted.
* You may only write 55 words.
* Your entry must be fiction.
* You may not alter the picture in any way.
* Post your entry as a blog on your page, and drop off the link in the comments section on this page.
*
 Have fun!  (Yes, it's a rule!  )

Sunday 22 April 2012

I'm a Soppy Sod!

Was just watching the end of this movie, and bawling my eyes out...as always!

Saturday 21 April 2012

K's FIAF #85


ENTRAPMENT 

She barely managed to stop the disdainful curl of her upper lip as she watched his jaw drop.  Yeah, what a difference some lip color makes.  He was just like all the rest.  Right, then!  Time for the second part of the plan...

Turning up her collar, she stared a moment longer, then turned away...

Fiction in a Flash #85

This photograph was taken from the Internet.

The "rules" are few and very simple:
* Your entry will come due each Saturday, when a new picture will be posted.
* You may only write 55 words.
* Your entry must be fiction.
* You may not alter the picture in any way.
* Post your entry as a blog on your page, and drop off the link in the comments section on this page.
*
 Have fun!  (Yes, it's a rule!  )

Sunday 15 April 2012

K's FIAF # 84


A GOOD CAUSE

"Come on, Jonas, look up!  Smile for the camera!"


"In this getup?  Hell, no!"

"Think of how many MORE calendars we'll sell when your lady friends see that that body's attached to YOUR handsome face!"

"What lady friends?  I've been on assignment for the last six months!"

"All the more reason to remind them, eh?"

Saturday 14 April 2012

Fiction in a Flash #84

This photograph was taken from the Internet.

The "rules" are few and very simple:
* Your entry will come due each Saturday, when a new picture will be posted.
* You may only write 55 words.
* Your entry must be fiction.
* You may not alter the picture in any way.
* Post your entry as a blog on your page, and drop off the link in the comments section on this page.
*
 Have fun!  (Yes, it's a rule!  )

Saturday 7 April 2012

If you read it on Kittigory...

(...give this a pass.  Maybe this isn't a rant, but it sure reads like it!)

In a thoughtful, even melancholy mood, and wondering about a host of things.  For example...

1.  If I die, what is my legacy?

--  Been trying to decide.  Do children count?  If so, I'll be leaving four behind to grace the world with whatever their gifts and talents are.  And if people in general count, then maybe the kids I've taught -- who remember me with fondness, who appreciate what I did when I tried to show them how to love the language and the books, and the power of the word -- maybe they are my legacy, as they share what I have taught them about passion and love with the people they come in contact with.  If my legacy is about my impact on others, then the people here and offline who care about me, who share their lives and love with me -- they are my legacy, if they give love away, as I do.

2.  What is my value to others?

-- I can't speak for others, of course, but I can speak of my perceptions of their (and your) behavior toward me, and how I interpret it.  So, if I were to go by my family and offline friends, I am worth hugs and kisses, homework help, a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, help with lesson planning and classroom management, a fountain of information, a reliable daughter/sibling.  To my true friends on here, like Tom, Babs, Barb, Tina, and Frank, I am worth your kindness, your concern, your faithfulness, perhaps even your love.  

-- To the people -- well, only men, really -- who judge me by the erotic stories I write, and make assumptions about who I am and what I want, I am a hole or two or three, a mind to fuck (pardon the vulgarity, but it suits this context!), words to jerk off to, a toy to seduce and use for sexual pleasure.  I'm not "worth" much to them, am I?  Good thing I know better...

3.  Whom do I trust?

-- *sigh*  I know you expect me to say I trust my family and those friends I have known forever. Perhaps I do, but trust is very hard for me.  Too many people have thrown my heart back in my face, probably because they don't see my true worth.  So the jury is out on this one, most of the time.  There is always a part of me that stands in reserve, watching over things, assessing and weighing, and ready to pull me back if it feels unsafe.  

4.  Have I done enough?

-- I am 53 years old.  What have I done with my life?  I've only ever had two jobs -- teacher and White Castle slave.  I love to write, but after all these years, and all this writing, nothing is complete.  Nothing is published.  I love to study, but after twelve years, I don't have that Ph. D. I started out trying to get.  I am one oral examination and a dissertation away from a degree I have wanted since I first became an undergraduate student in Jamaica, West Indies.  And I can't seem to find the will, or the time, to figure out how to do it now.  It's been too long -- getting a Ph. D. takes between 7 and 10 years -- and they will likely show me the door if I try to go back to finish it.  And there's a part of me that worries that I can't hack it anymore, that I don't have the academic or mental wherewithal to pull off my dream degree.  That is one scary thought!  

And I am also worried that when I retire from the New York City Department of Education in two more years, I will not be able to do enough to help with the bills, and that I will not find anything else to do that fulfills me, aside from write...and we have already discussed my inability, it seems, to finish anything I begin to write.

And if I take the less selfish thought track, and consider what I have done for others, it seems I haven't done enough there, either.  My sons never finished college, though now they are trying to get back on track.  My older girl is burning the candle at all ends, and doesn't understand that she needs to balance her endeavors so she doesn't burn out before age 25.  My youngest is giving me the kinds of headaches her older siblings never gave me, and making me wonder what sins I have committed for which I am now paying. My hubby is also misbehaving by not taking his health issues as seriously as he should.  I really don't think I have the intestinal fortitude to do what I think needs to be done to whip my family into shape.

5.  Will it always be this way?

--  I know, I ask the hard questions, but when I'm blue, they all come crowding in.  It's overwhelming.  I can't help but wonder if the second half of my life will be as fraught with turmoil as the first, with the expected addition of the ills that attend old age.  I'm not saying I'm old, but I'm no longer young, either.  When am I going to catch a break?  When will I see a dream fulfilled, something that is important to me as an individual, and not just something important to the family?  

Should I just brace myself for more of the same, and leave some strength of mind in reserve for the unexpected "slap in the face" or "punch in the gut"? I've sort of lived my whole life like that, expecting the other shoe to drop...and it usually does, with alarming, depressing, and apparently inevitable regularity.  How do I make the smile with which I greet the world most days a true reflection of the smile currently absent from my heart? 

Don't you just LOVE coming to my blogs to be depressed by my emotionalism?  Sorry, guys!

(Reposted from Kittigory) "Let Him Easter in us..."

These immortal words of Gerard Manley Hopkins, from his poem "The Wreck of the Deutschland", are a reminder of the meaning of Easter for those of use who follow the Christian faith.  It is a time of resurrection, symbolic of hope...you know, that emotion Emily Dickinson describes as "the thing with feathers/That perches in the soul". 

I'll share another Hopkins poem with you, one written for the season, and wish for you and yours the joy and peace the season means to bring.  Let the sacrifice and pain of One long gone give you renewed hope for the life you must lead daily, and renewed strength to meet its challenges with grace and serenity!

Happy Easter, everyone!  *hugs*

Easter Communion

Pure fasted faces draw unto this feast: 
God comes all sweetness to your Lenten lips.
You striped in secret with breath-taking whips, 
Those crooked rough-scored chequers may be pieced
To crosses meant for Jesu's; you whom the East 
With draught of thin and pursuant cold so nips
Breathe Easter now; you serged fellowships, 
You vigil-keepers with low flames decreased, 

God shall o'er-brim the measures you have spent
With oil of gladness, for sackcloth and frieze
And the ever-fretting shirt of punishment
Give myrrhy-threaded golden folds of ease.
Your scarce-sheathed bones are weary of being bent: 
Lo, God shall strengthen all the feeble knees. 

~ Gerard Manley Hopkins

K's FIAF #83

This photograph was taken from the Internet.

HER LIPS

He's always loved her lips.  He watches them shape themselves around her words.  Her tongue appears to moisten the full lower one.  They flash into a full smile - sunshine in the flesh.  A drop of champagne clings to the widow's peak of flesh, and her tongue sneaks out to steal it.  He licks his own.

Friday 6 April 2012

Fiction in a Flash #83

This photograph was taken from the Internet.

The "rules" are few and very simple:
* Your entry will come due each Saturday, when a new picture will be posted.
* You may only write 55 words.
* Your entry must be fiction.
* You may not alter the picture in any way.
* Post your entry as a blog on your page, and drop off the link in the comments section on this page.
*
 Have fun!  (Yes, it's a rule!  )

Sunday 1 April 2012

Monday Music Magic ~ "Spring"

The first thing that came to my mind, nerd that I am, when I saw this theme, was this poem by one of my favorite poets of all time, Gerard Manley Hopkins, the poet-priest of Oxford:

Spring

Nothing is so beautiful as Spring –         
   When weeds, in wheels, shoot long and lovely and lush;         
   Thrush’s eggs look little low heavens, and thrush         
Through the echoing timber does so rinse and wring         
The ear, it strikes like lightnings to hear him sing;
   The glassy peartree leaves and blooms, they brush         
   The descending blue; that blue is all in a rush         
With richness; the racing lambs too have fair their fling.         

What is all this juice and all this joy?         
   A strain of the earth’s sweet being in the beginning
In Eden garden. – Have, get, before it cloy,         
   Before it cloud, Christ, lord, and sour with sinning,         
Innocent mind and Mayday in girl and boy,         
   Most, O maid’s child, thy choice and worthy the winning.         

Then, I thought about the time of year.  Yeah, yeah, I know...I'm odd!  Ya loves me anyway, so there!    My thoughts about spring are these:

1.  Oh Lord!  Loads of rain...which is fine, as long as I don't have to drive in it, and it doesn't flood the roads and make commuting even more hazardous!
2.  Mosquitoes!  My kids, especially Mini Me, who has to walk up and down the driveway, wait at the end of it every morning to be picked up and dropped off from school, and will begin to play outside, will be eaten alive!!  She has many, MANY scars from mosquito stings -- her arms and legs are speckled with them, and they're ugly!  What the heck can I do to make it easier for her THIS year?
3.  Carpenter ants!  They'll be back with a vengeance as soon as it STAYS above "cold" outside, and I'll be tearing my hair out!  Grrr!
4.  Flies!  ... 

Hmmm...this seems to be degenerating into a blog about household pests.  This IS my reality, despite the beautiful arrival of cherry blossoms and the promise of warmth and the beauty of summer.  The unvarnished truth is that spring in the countryside is the harbinger of pest season...did I forget to mention deer ticks?  Oh yeah ... and this year the expectation is that since the ground has thawed sooner, and the creature that normally feeds on them has not had a chance to flourish because of the unnaturally dry winter, deer ticks will be even more prevalent on the ground this year, meaning Lyme disease cases will increase.

Ah, spring! 


In deference to those many ones of you who love spring as you see it as the beginning of baseball season, here's a picture, taken on one of my daily passes by there, and a tune...